Thursday, March 24, 2011

SAVINGS! SAVINGS! SAVINGS!


In these tough economic times, it is important to cut corners where you can. You can buy a cheaper bottle of wine but you'll only have to drink more, and faster, in order to stop tasting how bad it is. You're better off sticking with your favorite wine and instead save hundreds of dollars by opting not to get winter tires. But don't text and drive!

Thursday, March 17, 2011

a is for asshole. b is for butt face. c is for, well. Come on. You're thinking it too.



You have to be really careful when you speak to your young children. You have to choose your words wisely. For example, with swear words you don't want to add such weight to them lest your children decide to use them for attention or as a form of rebellion. That's why I like to keep my swear words 'light', 'sweet' and 'loving'. Like: you are so fucking cute. That is an acceptable use of swearing. I read that in one of the What to Expect book series. Or, I saw it on Oprah. 

Just trust me. 

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